99-word story: Leaving
The two men sat at the bar. From the other room came the rattle of a fruit machine and the clink of dishes.
Their beers stood mostly full.
The older man stared at his hands. The younger one watched the traffic pass and shrink into the distance.
“You sure you’re ready?” the older man said.
The younger man rubbed his eyes with both hands.
“It’s not me that decides. The decision’s been made. Guess I’d better get used to taking orders.”
He paused.
“I just hope I make it back.”
The older man nodded.
“Me too. Your mother especially.”
With this story, I wanted to try what Hemingway called the ‘Iceberg theory”, to see how much can be conveyed with as few words as possible. I hope I succeeded, to some degree.
My Words, My World 