My Words, My World

First drafts – A few pages in the large wilderness of the world of writing

Archive for the category “dreams”

99-word fiction: Return Ticket

The last of the boxes had been taken away – except one, sitting on the table in front of her.

A box full of items of no value: old letters, grandad’s cigarette case, a chipped cup, mum’s funeral service card.

One by one she laid them out on the table.

She pulled out an old purse and looked inside, not expecting to find money.

An old train ticket fell out, its edges worn between finger and thumb.

Her eyes widened and her chest felt heavy. She thought she’d thrown it away.

She stared at the words, “Return Ticket”. What if?

The current image has no alternative text. The file name is: return-ticket.jpg

Blood is Thicker than Ink

Welcome to the Advent Calendar Story Train, where you can read through 24 stories under the theme Surprise.

Jane sits at her desk at the front of the class. Following the expected high spirits before the Christmas holidays the class has now settled down and she can concentrate on marking their homework. She takes a moment to listen to the sleet lightly slap the window.

On her desk is a piece of A4 paper, its lines filled with neat, slanted writing in black ink, and the effect makes her tilt her head a little. In her hand is a red pen; and she doesn’t know where to start. She’s afraid to take her pen to the page, to leave ragged red scars and ruining the beauty of the writing.

But beauty is only skin deep, she thinks. It’s the content that counts.

Still her pen remains suspended over the page, as if defying her. She can’t understand where the problem lies; after all, everyone else had had little problem with the homework. At (almost, she tells herself) 16 years of age, the girl, Christine, should be more than capable of writing chapter summaries for The Grapes of Wrath. Spelling mistakes abounded and she still had problems with basic grammar. Jane thought back to her own childhood, how her mother had transmitted her love of English to her. A mother’s love. Even after what had happened, her mother’s love had remained constant. How she missed her mother. Jane sighs, then brings the red pen to bear.

The red pen stops its Bic blitzkrieg, and Jane thinks back to that chat with Christine earlier that term, just the two of them, and just after Jane had arrived at the school (There was only ever this school, she tells herself); teacher and student discussing the latter’s plans after leaving school.

‘I wanna be a journalist,’ the girl had said.

Jane is a great believer in optimism but concedes a limit must exist. The girl wanted to study journalism yet she could hardly construct a paragraph that didn’t require red biro butchery. She wouldn’t even get on one of the tabloids.

Jane had been digging that day and the chat had revealed more than anticipated. Christine was having a hard time of it at home. Being the eldest child, responsibility fell on her shoulders and she had to take care of the children while she should have been studying but her mother, (Mother!), was out and about and up to who knew what.

Looking down at the page, Jane too feels the weight of responsibility and wonders what she can do to help. A Christmas miracle, maybe, she thinks before making another note in the margin on the use of the apostrophe. Christine, we really need to look at the work you’re producing and how we can… improve it. There, that was tactful. Improve it.

Christina sits and writes, ignoring the class and the weather outside. She hates Christmas; why had she been born on Christmas Day? She couldn’t think of a worse day for a birthday.

The slap of sleet has given way to the patter of large snowflakes and the class, with their low ‘oohs’ and ‘ahs’ is now distracted. So is Jane. The only head that isn’t turned to the window is Christine’s, which is still down as she continues to write, which she does until the bell goes. Everyone is off their feet, with cries of “Happy Christmas, Miss” and out the door by the time Christine stops writing. Jane waits.

‘Christine, can I just have a moment, please?’

Jane walks over and closes the door. She comes back and sits on the desk in front of Christine and takes a deep breath.

‘Look, when you come back in January you’ll be in your last term before your exams.’ She hands Christine the homework and lets her read her comments. ‘If you can’t get these basics right, you’ll…’ “Fail” was too strong a word. ‘You’ll struggle in the exam. This is the one subject you need to have in the bag if you want to go on to study journalism, Christine.’

Christine looks up from the wave of red scrawl.

‘I will study journalism. I have to. I can’t fail. I won’t fail.’ Her shoulders sag and her head drops and rests on her upturned hands, elbows on the desk for support. She chokes back a sob. ‘I just can’t find the time to study.’

Jane wants to reach out and offer comfort. She needs to be practical.

‘So, let me help you find the time to study. Let’s say two hours a week.’

Christine’s head, still down, shakes a little.

‘I can’t. When I don’t have to look after the kids I work at the café twice a week. I can’t even afford to lose the pittance they pay.’

‘I know,’ says Jane, and Christine looks up, frowning. She opens her mouth, but Jane holds up her hand. ‘How much do they pay you?’

Christine’s eyes widen.

‘How much?’

Stung by the question’s directness Christine drops her stare. ‘Six quid an hour, four hours a week. Why? What’s it got to do with…’

Jane’s hand goes up again.

‘I’ll cover it. We’re more alike than you think. I too can’t fail. I won’t fail and you will pass this exam.’

‘But why would you do something like this for me? Why would anyone look out more me like that?’

It’s now or never, thinks Jane and her hand reaches across the table. At first Christine’s hand is reluctant but then surrenders.

A mother’s love. Her mother’s love. Memories come flooding back. The affair, his arrest, the sacking, his career lying in tatters. Jane the 15-year-old, pregnant by her English teacher, forgiven by her mother and finally giving birth on the day her classmates were at home unwrapping their presents. A mother’s love.

‘On Christmas Day, it’ll be 16 years that I’ve been looking out for you.

The end

Thank you for reading today’s story. The next one will be available to read on December 17th, titled “A Disappointing Surprise“. This link will be active tomorrow when the post goes live.

If you missed yesterday’s you can go and read it here.

Blood is Thicker than Ink

Welcome to the Advent Calendar Story Train, where you can read through 24 stories under the theme Surprise.

Jane sits at her desk at the front of the class. Following the expected high spirits before the Christmas holidays the class has now settled down and she can concentrate on marking their homework. She takes a moment to listen to the sleet lightly slap the window.

On her desk is a piece of A4 paper, its lines filled with neat, slanted writing in black ink, and the effect makes her tilt her head a little. In her hand is a red pen; and she doesn’t know where to start. She’s afraid to take her pen to the page, to leave ragged red scars and ruining the beauty of the writing.

But beauty is only skin deep, she thinks. It’s the content that counts.

Still her pen remains suspended over the page, as if defying her. She can’t understand where the problem lies; after all, everyone else had had little problem with the homework. At (almost, she tells herself) 16 years of age, the girl, Christine, should be more than capable of writing chapter summaries for The Grapes of Wrath. Spelling mistakes abounded and she still had problems with basic grammar. Jane thought back to her own childhood, how her mother had transmitted her love of English to her. A mother’s love. Even after what had happened, her mother’s love had remained constant. How she missed her mother. Jane sighs, then brings the red pen to bear.

The red pen stops its Bic blitzkrieg, and Jane thinks back to that chat with Christine earlier that term, just the two of them, and just after Jane had arrived at the school (There was only ever this school, she tells herself); teacher and student discussing the latter’s plans after leaving school.

‘I wanna be a journalist,’ the girl had said.

Jane is a great believer in optimism but concedes a limit must exist. The girl wanted to study journalism yet she could hardly construct a paragraph that didn’t require red biro butchery. She wouldn’t even get on one of the tabloids.

Jane had been digging that day and the chat had revealed more than anticipated. Christine was having a hard time of it at home. Being the eldest child, responsibility fell on her shoulders and she had to take care of the children while she should have been studying but her mother, (Mother!), was out and about and up to who knew what.

Looking down at the page, Jane too feels the weight of responsibility and wonders what she can do to help. A Christmas miracle, maybe, she thinks before making another note in the margin on the use of the apostrophe. Christine, we really need to look at the work you’re producing and how we can… improve it. There, that was tactful. Improve it.

Christina sits and writes, ignoring the class and the weather outside. She hates Christmas; why had she been born on Christmas Day? She couldn’t think of a worse day for a birthday.

The slap of sleet has given way to the patter of large snowflakes and the class, with their low ‘oohs’ and ‘ahs’ is now distracted. So is Jane. The only head that isn’t turned to the window is Christine’s, which is still down as she continues to write, which she does until the bell goes. Everyone is off their feet, with cries of “Happy Christmas, Miss” and out the door by the time Christine stops writing. Jane waits.

‘Christine, can I just have a moment, please?’

Jane walks over and closes the door. She comes back and sits on the desk in front of Christine and takes a deep breath.

‘Look, when you come back in January you’ll be in your last term before your exams.’ She hands Christine the homework and lets her read her comments. ‘If you can’t get these basics right, you’ll…’ “Fail” was too strong a word. ‘You’ll struggle in the exam. This is the one subject you need to have in the bag if you want to go on to study journalism, Christine.’

Christine looks up from the wave of red scrawl.

‘I will study journalism. I have to. I can’t fail. I won’t fail.’ Her shoulders sag and her head drops and rests on her upturned hands, elbows on the desk for support. She chokes back a sob. ‘I just can’t find the time to study.’

Jane wants to reach out and offer comfort. She needs to be practical.

‘So, let me help you find the time to study. Let’s say two hours a week.’

Christine’s head, still down, shakes a little.

‘I can’t. When I don’t have to look after the kids I work at the café twice a week. I can’t even afford to lose the pittance they pay.’

‘I know,’ says Jane, and Christine looks up, frowning. She opens her mouth, but Jane holds up her hand. ‘How much do they pay you?’

Christine’s eyes widen.

‘How much?’

Stung by the question’s directness Christine drops her stare. ‘Six quid an hour, four hours a week. Why? What’s it got to do with…’

Jane’s hand goes up again.

‘I’ll cover it. We’re more alike than you think. I too can’t fail. I won’t fail and you will pass this exam.’

‘But why would you do something like this for me? Why would anyone look out more me like that?’

It’s now or never, thinks Jane and her hand reaches across the table. At first Christine’s hand is reluctant but then surrenders.

A mother’s love. Her mother’s love. Memories come flooding back. The affair, his arrest, the sacking, his career lying in tatters. Jane the 15-year-old, pregnant by her English teacher, forgiven by her mother and finally giving birth on the day her classmates were at home unwrapping their presents. A mother’s love.

‘On Christmas Day, it’ll be 16 years that I’ve been looking out for you.

The end

Thank you for reading today’s story. The next one will be available to read on December 17th, titled “A Disappointing Surprise“. This link will be active tomorrow when the post goes live.

If you missed yesterday’s you can go and read it here.

The drip, drip, drip of the leaking tap

The drip, drip, drip of the leaking tap,
tightened to the full yet still…
drip, drip, drip,
like some mad aquatic clock
or a water deity’s idea of a joke
and where does all this water go?

Does it race along the tubes and pipes
only to be unceremoniously
spat out
into some shitty sewage treatment works?

Or does it instead splash happily along
those tubes and pipes
and find itself jettisoned
into a little stream,
just a trickle at first
which is then joined by others,
left to the same fate
and together they form a river
which gets faster,
noisy, rushing water tumbling over stones worn smooth
and dancing over rocks and waterfalls
and down, always down until finally,
in the distance,
there’s the sunlight’s reflection on water
and the river’s pace gathers
and drives on
then, finally, pours into the sea
where the drip, drip, drip of the leaking tap
becomes waves upon the shore.

English teacher (with writer’s block)

My day is filled with verbs and tenses
clauses, phrases, words and sentences
grammatical structures
quantifiers and determiners

My past participle participated and departed
my present continuous continues to continue
while my future simple
will be far from simple

I’m conditioned by my conditionals
and positioned by my prepositions

I’m an English teacher who wants to write
my language is my day
but when I put that pen in my hand
I’ve nothing left to say

Night kiss

3am, Sunday morning.
Dragged from dreams,
where feet walk on frosted blades
as a million stars fall from the sky,
which shivers
over silent faces hidden from me.
I reach out, they turn away
I call out, and they fade
 
The day,
still hours distant
is crawling round to meet me
 
I stand in the moon’s shadow
as the snow peaks stand hard and white
against black sky brushed with sweeping cloud,
the air cold on my skin
and I awaken under its kiss.
Nocturnal sighs in the blackened boughs
and, once again,
I have been tossed out into the night.

Lugano night, 3am.

Lugano night, 3am.

3000 miles

3000 miles of ocean

as dry as a desert highway

Distinct words from remote voices

I hear you speak

as distances vanish in the setting sun,

my setting sun

as I become the nightfall.

Eyes flicker in the madness of dreams

Then open; awoken

but the images remain

The bark of the beggar

as the sidewinder stamps its tail in the sand

of the desert highway,

where 3000 miles of ocean lay.

 

 

 

Post Navigation